October 2024
Psychics, Inktober, some little pics, and more.
Image above: a little pumpkin because happy halloween!! I love little light green pumpkins with long stems
On Talking to Psychics
Earlier this year I had my first ever reading with a psychic. A few friends of mine had talked to this same person and returned with glowing reviews; she had predicted relationships, career shifts, and even pregnancies all over the phone without ever having met in person. Though I didn’t have any burning questions about my future and wasn’t questioning my life any more than usual, I decided to book a reading— talking with someone who had access to the future was too enticing to pass up. What did she know about me and where I was headed? I had to know!
In preparing for our session, I tried to consider all my current life uncertainties and come up with some solid questions. Though I could think of many (Where will my career take me? Am I on the right path? etc), I realized that many of my questions had much more to do with the present and whether how I was living was “right” or “wrong” than with the future. For example, I wondered whether or not I was spending enough time with my family members and if I was connecting with them well enough, or in the “right” ways. I imagine that I was hoping the psychic would warn me of future regrets I would have if I didn’t change my ways and try to connect more with relatives, but in hindsight I think I was comparing my relationships to those of others and wondering if, because they were different, they were “wrong” or not good enough. Similarly, I wondered if I would ever stop worrying about money, hoping the psychic could give me comfort in the knowledge of a stable financial future or predictions of any difficulties or windfalls that lie ahead. I guess I was looking for some sense of certainty or confirmation that I was doing my life “right.”
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As soon as the reading began, I realized that it would be much different than what I expected. Rather than make predictions (though she did have eerily relevant thoughts about potential career shifts I might soon make), the psychic helped me look at my life in new ways and to give me a perspective shift that I didn’t realize I needed. I had expected lots of focus on the future but instead, the psychic spent much of our session in the past.
In response to my questions about family relationships, rather than issue warnings or advice she helped me see the value in my current relationships and to accept things as they are. She told me that in my past lives, I had always been part of big religious families in which I lived for others and that the purpose of my life this go around was to live for myself. She reframed my concerns that I wasn’t connecting well enough or spending enough time with family as each of us living in ways that suited us best and urged me not to carry the weight of all of my family’s relationships on my shoulders. As a person who has been chronically plagued with guilt about not being enough to others, this reframe gave me a huge release.
Similarly, when it came to career advice, rather than focus on specific jobs and income, she spoke about my energy and what changes I need to make to protect and channel it in effective ways. My work with families in crisis has always felt especially challenging and often leaves me feeling completely drained, so having the psychic immediately notice this and share the importance of taking care of my energy made me feel especially seen. She emphasized using energy effectively over “career growth” or following a certain path, another perspective shift that I think I was desperately in need of and that has since caused me to look at my work life much differently.
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At the very start of the session, the psychic gave me a talk about my “angels” (according to her, everyone has two angels watching over them and this is who she gets her information from; my angels are Maryanne and George 💁♀️) and told me that if I want or need anything, all I need to do is ask my angels. When asking angels for things we need to be very, very specific, “because the angels have never been human before and sometimes have a hard time understanding what we’re saying.” One could be turned off by the woo-woo-ness of this but I love the way she used different language to talk about something that is actually evidence-based: the practice of visualizing what we want. My biggest takeaway from my session with the psychic was the exact opposite of what I expected: we are in control of our future, so we need to be intentional and specific about what we want. Of course we can’t control everything and things will happen the way they will, but these two statements aren’t mutually exclusive. We have no control over the universe, AND we have full control of our actions and how we choose to experience the world.
Though this isn’t necessarily what I wanted to hear (because asking for/knowing what I want is hard!!), I was surprised to find that this wisdom made me feel much more optimistic and empowered to take control of my future. Although it may have been exciting to hear from the psychic that I would pursue a certain path or reach certain milestones in the future, I now realize how limiting hearing these predictions would be. One of my favorite parts of life has been following my interests and instincts as they grow and shift, and knowing what’s next would take a lot of the fun and excitement out of that. The older I get, the more I realize that though part of me longs for stability and predictability, it’s the unexpected twists and turns of life that make me feel human and alive.
By reminding me that my future is in my hands, the psychic gave me a sense of control over the uncontrollable, which I guess is what I was looking for all along.
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Some Little Pictures:
(from top left to bottom right)
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October Playlist
Another year, another spooky songs playlist! TBH I listen to pretty “spooky” vibey stuff all year long so this is always my favorite playlist to make. This year’s feels a bit more “casually spooky” and less BOO!, if you know what I mean.
Image above: a little picture I made for inktober (the word of the day was “boots”)— I do love how the quick daily practice format allows for experimenting with new styles
Recent Work: Inktober
It’s here again!! Every year Inktober sneaks up on me and at once inspires me to get back into a daily drawing routine and reminds me of the relentless productivity push that social media can become. I am constantly oscillating between wanting to be a person who draws every day no matter what and wanting to be a person who is in tune with her needs and takes breaks and rests, even if that comes at the cost of artistic consistency. Is being an artist about showing up to the canvas day after day, relentlessly pursuing one’s craft? Or is “artist” a label/quality that persists despite any gaps in creating?
As usual, both are true, but I find this duality especially hard to hold, probably because I have a drive in me to create purely for the sake of creating daily that is in conflict with our capitalist society in which I must work for profit to survive. This month I’ve tried to draw as consistently as possible, whether I post to social media or not, and that has felt good and has helped me think more about what a balanced life looks like to me.
TL:DR: I am still here struggling to create consistently in a world that values capital over creativity and will likely always be here, and I’m happy that I have this community of you all here with me 💖 Happy Inktober!
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Some Other Good Things
Obsessed with this Bill Watterson graduation speech. I vow to read this once a month to keep me on the right path.
Shameless plug: I’m going to be on Therapist in Tech’s podcast today! Probably not interesting to anyone outside of health tech but a girlie’s gotta share. I think I’m more honored by the Halloween drop date than being featured on the pod because I love to be associated with Halloween in any way obviously.
Are you wanting to get into sewing but don’t know where to start? I recently stumbled onto seamstress Carly B’s videos (thanks, YouTube algorithm!) and she has this great video where she shares a lot of fun patterns that increase in difficulty as the video goes on. I’ve made things from many of the pattern makers she shared so can attest to her thoughts on easy vs. more difficult patterns! Also here for support if you’re just getting started— it can feel tough at first but I firmly believe that anyone can sew.
I am a long time Juliet Meeks stan (I first met her online while doing a 100 day project and have loved following her journey) so you know I love that her email newsletters have started up again after a bit of a break and I ESPECIALLY love a recent one she sent in which she was transparent about the hard work, time, and dedication that it takes to make money from art licensing (I wish I could link to it but alas it is currently not on her blog— you’ll just have to sign up for her newsletter for more gems in the future!TL:DR she says 20k is a realistic earnings goal for art licensing after a few years of hard work, but 100k+ would likely take 10+ years of dedicated work. I really value her putting this out there because many bloggers claim that after taking one of their workshops you can magically start earning 100k+ from art licensing instantly. The internet is rampant with "get rich quick” videos for artists and misleading art bloggers who glamorize the life of an independent maker and honestly I find these takes so damaging both to individuals who may be misled and to how outsiders view artists (but that is a rant for another time!). So glad to have Juliet around to keep it real!
ESSENTIAL VIEWING: Conner O’Malley’s “Rap World.” I know I was just raving about The Substance last month but this is probably the most important film of the year.
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Thanks for reading – see you next month!
I love your writing & artwork so much. I feel such a kinship with you already, but hearing "as a person who has been chronically plagued with guilt about not being enough to others" truly HIT. I've noticed that kind-hearted souls need to be reminded to live for themselves & not others (I know I did!) Thank you for sharing yourself, and for highlighting other artists—you are one-of-a-kind. I'm routing for you & enjoying your journey along the way. 🖤 p.s. I secretly love psychics, haha!